American: *watches a cartoon about an anthropomorphic sponge living in an underwater pineapple*
American: *has newborn child’s foreskin surgically removed*
American: *takes off shirt and paints self up in team colors at football stadium*
American: *attaches a plastic scrotum to pickup truck*
American: *reads sensationalist and discredited article on the internet about supposed eyeball-licking trend* “Wow, Japan is so WEIRD, lol”
My truck nuts are chrome.